February 15, 2015
So I started this blog in 2011 for one of the courses I was taking in school and I recently decided to start it up again. Not for school, but for sanity. You see, my life script has added a new scene in it recently and it is an ever-changing bipolar scene. I recently became responsible for another human being. December 12, 2014 my alien became a living, breathing, needy human being. This day shit got real.
I guess I should start from the beginning...NOT...hell the beginning of this story was 7 years ago, and I can barely remember to brush my teeth right now much less all of the details that brought me to where I am now, but in short Girl met boy, boy older than girl, girl and boy fall in love and the rest is what they say history. The good, bad and the ugly have all been covered in this love story...but then girl and boy found out in April 2014 that they would be having a baby. Little did the girl and boy know, life really does change completely once the alien becomes a human. [Okay let me explain the alien thing, my dad and I referred to the baby as alien...because heck when it's wiggling around inside of you, pushing on your ribs, giving you indigestion, and tap dancing on your bladder all while tucked away in the fluid filled abyss, it really does seem like you have an alien growing inside of you.] Well that's the short story that bring me to where I am today, which is on the couch with my baby boy lying on my chest breathing heavily with his milk breath in my face.
I decided to start this blog up again, because I have realized that I needed somewhere to write/share all of the good, bad, and ugly days that I have in this new life with my (no longer alien) baby. I realize that I wanted somewhere to talk about the troubles I'm having or the awesome successes without feeling like I am getting on someone's nerves or like I shouldn't feel the way I do, because lets be honest, everyone has an opinion when it comes to parenting and they will give it to you.
Starting with the pregnancy, I was pretty much the opposite of every horrible story that I heard. Instead of becoming a whale-I gained 13lbs, instead of morning sickness- I got night nausea, instead of sleepiness-I got drop dead-need 10hrs of sleep to function, instead of stretchmarks...just kidding I got those boogers, and might I add after pushing out a tiny human I believe they should change the name of them to battle scars, because that is what labor is. Labor is a total war. You think that all of sudden you get a break from the pain and you are managing it great by singing your 90s songs and getting back massages from your sisters but then BAM you feel like your body is fighting against you and that the pain will never end...then the contraction ends and life is good again (for maybe a minute) then repeat. Pretty much every item I had in my birthing plan was thrown out the window due to my blood pressure (well that's what they said was the reason) In reality, I feel like they just didn't give a damn what my plans were, they were going to do or say what they wanted because hell they are the 'professionals' and "they know what's best". Whatever I'll stop complaining now, because even after the hours of contractions, pushing, hunger, and exhaustion I know that I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. Because the moment they threw my baby boy onto my chest and his big blue balls flaunted in my face, my life changed. I never knew just how much love I could have for another single human until those moments after he was born. At first I thought, Oh shit! What do I do know? it's real...he is here. Then I saw Tim holding him and I realized that no matter what, we would make sure that he was taken care of and from that moment on...that's what we have done. Not always the "right" way...but hell we have managed to keep him alive so far so we must be doing something right.
It's bedtime in our house...so I'll continue with how the past 7 weeks have gone in the next post...that's where all the reasons I decided to start up the blog come from because I truly feel the need to have a place to discuss my confusions, frustrations, and successes in this new life of ours.
Until next Time..
"Motherhood is a great honor and privilege, yet it is also synonymous with servanthood. Every day women are called upon to selflessly meet the needs of their families. Whether they are awake at night nursing a baby, spending their time and money on less-than-grateful teenagers, or preparing meals, moms continuously put others before themselves." Charles Stanley
